A Journey

Category: women

Taylor Swift

God I love her.  I want to send her a thank you note.  I feel like she helped me raise my daughters and gave them someone smart, feminine, and creative to look up to.  I like that she isn’t afraid to be a role model.  She seems like a normal girl and I guess that is her appeal.

My girls were able to get a meet & greet before one of her concerts.  I was more than a little nervous because sometimes meeting your idol in person can diminish the dream in your head.  I have to say that Taylor Swift met and exceeded the idea they had of her.  It’s been almost 4 years since that fateful day but I remember the excitement when they came through the door…”she’s so tall, she’s so beautiful, she was SO nice!”  My older daughter brought her a letter she wrote.  I came across it the other day and I think it says it all…

“Taylor,

I can’t even believe that I am writing you a letter right now or that I’m actually going to meet you.  I am 16 and for the past 3 years I have been dreaming of meeting you.  Every year for my birthday I have asked for a hug from you (and possibly to have you sing me a song like “Fifteen”)!  But obviously you didn’t just appear at my house on my birthday :)!

You are the only singer I have on my iPod and the only celebrity I’ve ever wanted to meet.  And that is because you are so inspiring, relatable and really seem like a genuinely nice person.  You have shown me that I don’t need to be “cool” or try so hard.  You have taught me that it’s good to be my goofy self and always stay true to who I am.  You have shown me that there is nothing wrong with me if a boy doesn’t like me, because you’ve been through it too.  And when girls are just plain mean, you have shown me that I can rise above it and that I am better than that.  And now all I want is to be kissed in the rain (so my mom keeps joking that she’s going to keep me inside on rainy days :).

Thank you for being here for me as I grow up, even though you didn’t know you were. Meeting you will be one of the most unbelievable experiences of my life and you inspire me by just being you.”

If I were to write Taylor Swift a thank you note I’d thank her for sharing her ability to express what it means to be a girl.  I’d thank her for making mistakes.  I’d tell her to hug her mom because she must have a really good one.  I love Taylor Swift.

But, I do still prefer dogs to cats.

the college process

Wow.  What an interesting experience.  A few more weeks of waiting and we will finally know where this long, drawn out road will lead her…and us.

I will say that my daughter has learned a lot about herself through writing the essays for her college applications.  It is a difficult thing to do…write about yourself, express your feelings with strangers, and usually fit your personality or life story into 400 words or less!   A tough challenge for anyone but I think it’s expecting a lot from a 17 year old.  It was one of the many times I’ve watched my daughter struggle and grow before my eyes.

One of the applications asked “What contemporary issue or trend relating to politics, culture and society, or foreign policy particularly concerns you and why?”  This is what she wrote:

“Prior to high school, I didn’t understand the meaning of feminism. I had a subconscious understanding but I never understood the extent of its importance. When I came to high school, I found an empowering all-female environment and I was able to give a name to the sexism I had seen in middle school. At our school, everyone identifies as a feminist, because it is easy and popular to call yourself a feminist. In an all-female environment, there are very few factors that challenge your confidence or demean you as a woman. However, when I step outside of school, I realize that the rest of the world doesn’t hold these beliefs and it is much more difficult to put feminist ideals into action.

In politics, female politicians are criticized based on their appearance, while male politicians receive more attention for the issues they promote. In the media, there are very few movies that feature a female lead or even pass the Bechtel Test. In the workforce, not only are women paid less than their male counterparts, but they are also constantly concerned with a work-life balance. Women who work are criticized for not adequately parenting their children, while women who stay home are undervalued for their work as mothers.                                                                                                                                

Among my friends, I see girls who are quick to call out sexism in class, but fail to make the connection around boys. I see girls using an editing app to make themselves look skinnier on Instagram. I see girls treating their friends as competition rather than standing by each other. By making a choice not to engage in these demeaning behaviors, I am advocating feminism in my own life.                                                      I am not just someone who holds feminist beliefs, but I vocalize the need for feminism every day. Many people do not realize that feminism simply calls for the equality of women. Forty-two years later, and the ERA still has not been ratified (a fact I never fail to bring up at least once a week).                              

When these misconceptions about women and feminism exist so prominently, it is more difficult for women to gain full equality in politics, the media, and the workforce, and for young women to fight sexism in their social lives. By continuing to advocate for women’s issues, I hope to make feminism feel more real and pertinent to both my peers and society as a whole.”

As I said,  you can blame my daughters.

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